Life is so much shorter than we think. Make your art. Take care of each other. Risk everything for joy.
Chani nicholas
I can’t remember exactly why I stopped blogging, but I can tell you how it all started.
In 2009, I returned to New York after two years in San Francisco. Pursuing a Masters degree in Sexuality Studies was both life-affirming and hella traumatic at the same time.
I needed a place to unpack all the unresolved graduate studies trauma. I also started my first salaried job in 2009. The novelty of finally being an “adult” led to many stories that had to be documented.
But then something weird happened: people started reading.
When I coined The Black Sex Master in 2009, I had no expectations. I was writing for me.
Over a decade later, I’ve maintained over 500 followers on Twitter. Strangers would reach out and tell me how much they enjoyed my writing. Many times I gave them a good laugh. In other cases, folks were grateful I explored topics many others weren’t discussing back then: open relationships and sexual assault to name a few.
I still believe in the original thesis of this blog: people don’t talk about sex enough, especially people of color.
We’re so busy putting out other fires (e.g. poverty, police brutality, white supremacy, etc.), interrogating interpersonal relationships is often something that doesn’t happen. If I can contribute to a little more conversation in our communities, then it’s all worth it.
I want to tell you what’s happened the past few years, but I have to start at the beginning.
Let’s begin Phase 2.